Damn it...Why do I feel this way? I mean obviously it is normal for a person suffering from dilemmas like the ones I have to be tormented in so much pain...But why me? Why now? It seems so unlikely for me to encounter such problems like this. Really unexpected. And now that it hits me. It feels like I'm being cut open without anesthesia. It is so painful. Really painful. And I'm doing the best I can to just try and divert my attention to other things. I know for a fact it won't solve a thing, but hey, I'm just trying the possibilities on how to make myself feel better. It sucks.

I used to express myself well by means of writing. I used to feel better. But now...It seems so different. The more I write, the more pain I inflict to myself... But then again I guess it's ok... I'll just try to feel all the pain...try to savor each moment of torture...and in the end, I know I'll learn to get over it. At least I know I didn't cover a big wound with a band aid and forget about it. I let the wound heal by itself and felt enough pain to learn and realize how drastic things can change.

It's been exactly 3 hours and 20 minutes past my lunch break and I haven't had a decent meal since I left my house. Well actually I haven't had anything except for a cup of coffee, a dose of parental fights, 3 blog entries and a nice conversation with friends....

I'm so sad... :'(